My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
you just cant say you love him and then say you want to fuck your boss
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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