Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
When we were fucking, you could hear the beer sloshing around in my stomach
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Congrats. You made me have an orgasm in Starbucks.
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I lost the right to judge tonight
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize