I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
I'm supposed to nail the old lady at 1:30 so I'll see you at 1:35ish.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
On a scale of 1 to alcoholic in withdrawal how ready will you be to start drinking as soon as you arrive on campus?
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
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