we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
Nothing says 'good morning' like waking up only to realize this chick was watching you sleep. She's crazy
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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