The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
If its called oral, why is it so hard to talk?
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
She just told me she's too full for a reach-around. Sad.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Only I could dislocate my ribcage coaching volleyball and still want to get drunk tonight.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
