sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
strike ten. I need to stop drinkng
my new years resolutions dont apply when im drunk
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
The cl.oudds are foaming a really big pen.Is OMG.
Randomize
