And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Randomize