He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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