I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
And the next thing I knew I was blowing this random hot italian bartender with an uncircumcised penis in his work closet
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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