so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
No one understands that once a girl pours a handle of smirnoff all over herself, clearly she is wasted
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Randomize
