Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
He'd rather cuddle with his shitty little miniature dog than the half naked girl in his bed. I've lost all hope for him and my vagina
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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