Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
he left me a note this morning. it said "thank you for letting me touch you"
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
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