this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
At the bar dressed as a taco. not a typo. Come down.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
He looks like the kind of guy that would jack off to weird things.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize