Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
You would get kicked out of the study lounge for being drunk the monday of finals week
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
Randomize
