This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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