dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
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