i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
I just realized I use Twitter to keep of track of when I get drunk.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
Is this really the life I've chosen for myself?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
