my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Found your dick twin last night
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Randomize
