I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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