Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Randomize
