The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
Started crying to "that's the way it is" by celine. What the fuck uterus?!
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
