i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
She was cute in her own little way. Shit, free taco's makes anyone hot.
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