Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
A zombie called me motorboat central while participating in an auction to motorboat my tits. he then proceeded to propose, insisting that he makes alot money.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
The adults are the big ones right?
Randomize