Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
9 am booty call on your ex's birthday. Fuck yea
Randomize
