The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
yeah, i'm not. but i'm ready for free bjs. it's just hard to find women who will give me a beej while i'm sobbing uncontrollably
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
You were only speaking with either thumbs up, thumbs down, or high fives haha
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