Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
Spotted: shirtless guy wearing cut-off hot shorts, 1 cowboy boot and a sombrero puking in a bush while his friend yelled 'stop being a bitch" from the sidewalk'. Happy 4th of July 'merica!
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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