It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
