Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
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