david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Of course I lose my iPhone but still manage to hold on to the ruler for my dirty teacher costume
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
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