So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I just ASL-ed someone for the first time since 2002.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
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