I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
dying me prepared for dead me... i woke up with my laptop open to the last snl episode, a bottle of gatorade, advil and a bag of chocolate all next to me
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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