Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
This is a test message to see whether or not the recipient is alive.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
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