let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I wanna go back to school and change my major to psych just to make a case study out of her
I hung my underwear from the tree in his front yard. Consider my territory marked.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
Randomize
