Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
There is now a Twilight themed dildo. What do YOU want for christmas??
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i'm in workout clothes. this is progress.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
