I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
new low, i just stole money from my 5 year old sister to buy condoms
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Or I die of a heart attack, which is the more likely/less fun scenario.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'm not trying to alarm you guys, but I think I just swallowed a ketchup packet.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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