if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
