I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
Randomize
