I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Definately laid on the floor of the shower this morning drinking the water as it fell on me.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I have feelings that need drinking.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
I woke up wearing mittens dude
I woke up in my bathtub with the potted plant from downstairs.
checkmate.
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