Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
What?? I'm covered in blood at the hospital, I atleast deserve a pic of someones boobs
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize
