Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
If her puking on your pool table is her sign of a good night, it's time to intervene.
random memory from the wedding, the bartender show us how to open the windows of the hotel and pee out of them
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
Randomize