my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Randomize
