is it possible for your nipples to fall off? if so mine might. they hurt so bad...
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
Randomize
