Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
Oh btw, ur tongue should count as a second cock it's that good
Randomize
