HIV tests are more positive than that guy
Lady with a stroller in a bar. Think she's out of my league?
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I'm sure nobody at Walmart was wondering why I was wearing a glittery tutu and needed $300 changed into small bills
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
