Hey man sorry I got all grabby
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
I remember her trying to talk to me a few times after we broke up and I'd always change the subject to bagels.
Eventually evolution will just give us a better liver anyway, so our great great grandkids should THANK us for our binge drinking.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
i will be the first lesbian to ever fail women's studies.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
WHAT KIND OF DEALER ONLY WORKS FRI-SUN???
Ours, apparently.
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
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