did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
Dude, for your own safety, do not bring that chick home. I'm pretty sure you're going to find a marsupial pouch smuggling a fresh batch of herpes under that hoodie. Bail bail bail bail bail.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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