i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
i just peed out my two story window using my cell phone as a flashlight . hope the neighbors didnt see
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Don't worry, the house smells like waffles more than sex
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
Please ask me to tell you about the time I watched two of my friends chase my drunk roommate with a broken foot around downtown
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize