apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Just found cake in my bra, debating if I should eat it
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize