Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
My pants are on and I'm pretty sure I tried to throw them at someone.
Why does 2015 have to start with so many regrets?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I want to disappear from this job like a fart in the wind.💨
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