Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
Randomize
