So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
Mom wants to know why I'm bringing a blender back to college.... didn't have the heart to tell her she's paying a $20,000 tuition for us to make margaritas and sleep through class
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
this morning's inventory: a top hat, two empty bottles of everclear, half a slim jim, cigars, tiara, pot necklace, and some fishnets. and that's just my purse.
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